Well, after four hours of watching orientation videos I feel, um, overwhelmed maybe? Or more just over exposed. When you spend that long staring at TV screens you really don't get a whole lot out of it. Fortunately they have a first day that is also training or I'd be struggling for sure. My eyes glazed over after about the first five minutes. I had a few starbursts to sugar rush me through, but otherwise it was just a drag. Fortunately, I wasn't alone in training, and the manager was there joking about it all the whole time, so we were able to do more than just go fully brain dead.
In my last post I sorta got off the track of what I'd originally intended to write. I was actually thinking to do a piece on culture shock. There is always an element of that feeling going into a new job. It might be done in your native language, but there are all these specialized terms and acronyms to take in and process. Each job has it's own list of skills, and each store it's own way of dealing with things. I really am feeling rather numb after it all.
I was greeted with warm hugs and sweet words when I got home. It's nice to have someone to support me through all these things. He asked me what sort of feeling I got from the job, if I think I'll be happy and like it there. At the moment I was so filled up with information that all I could do was point out my sadness at having lost another mini bottle of hand sanitizer off my purse. I'm literally starting everything over again, at the very bottom of the heap, with nothing in my background to suggest my ability to do this job. I'm sure I can get it done, can be competitive and efficient and friendly in whatever order they're expected, but it does take a total mind readjustment.
I'm not going to be teaching. I'm not going to get any respect. I'm going to be talked down to out of necessity, as the training videos made it painfully clear. I'm not going to make a lot of money or work decent hours. In truth, I'll be starting Monday morning at 7AM, a thought that sends little pin pricks of fear down my spine. At least I won't be expected to deal with the general public at that hour, but not being a morning person it'll be the usual stretch that such things are. While Julie got all excited about working hours like that, I just hope I can manage to be friendly and active as expected.
I think the biggest challenge will be knowing that I'm not really helping anyone. I've always struggled in situations that aren't somehow service oriented. I need that feeling of working for the greater good to maintain balance. Somehow I have to convince my brain that organizing things on shelves and providing an enjoyable shopping experience is worth my time and effort. I have to really value the fact that I'll be working at a store that provides lower cost fashion to people who want to look nice but can't afford to shop at high end stores. That's a service, right? And somehow valuable... I know it'll be a struggle, but the people seem really friendly so far, and I have always enjoyed shopping there, so I'm hoping to be able to step up to the challenge and make a good go of this new job choice.
I just wish someone would be there bright and early Monday morning to remind me exactly why I opted for a job with this type of schedule!