Wednesday, November 23, 2011

Short timer

I've come to the point again where I'm a short timer. It always puts me in a strange mood. Regardless of the life change, it's always somewaht disconcerting. I'm back in the land of the unemployed. My future is once again up in the air. Having always been the sort of person who enjoys a certain amount of control over things, a wide safety net and all of that, I have to admit I'm a bit uneasy. I'm sure things will all work out, and of course I'm excited about the travel that's about to happen, but it's hard not to let the concerns and worries of this life crop up.
For some reason I'm suddenly reminded of this article in one of my old English teaching books about this man who just decided to give up everything and live in the woods. He still had a job, still had friends and family, but he slept in the woods in his one suit and that was pretty much it. I'm not sure what all he was trying to prove, but the fact of the matter is that he did it. He went out and just slept on the ground and cooked food in a pot over a fire like a classical hobo. Of course he also still had connections to technology and wrote a blog about it as well. I just can't imagine having that sort of dream.
Granted, it's equally hard for me to imagine the life I see lived on HGTV. These young couples just starting out and buying expensive homes that I could never even concieve of being able to afford. They nit pick about absoultely everything. I saw an episode of "House Hunters International" where this girl was moving to Abu Dhabi, and she kept complianing about the tile on the floors, like that having ugly floors would ruin her entire experience there. Still a lot better than sleeping on the ground, right?
I know I'm not likely to be buying a house or sleeping on the ground anytime soon, it's just that my head is a bit of a mess. I have to pack, both for my trip and also for moving, and my motivation is at an all time low. I'm not really even sure why. I just can't manage to get myself to get anything done. I just want to play with my iPad, or read a book, or stare mindlessly out the window. I've been getting little things done. I've finally finished my thank you cards, but I still have wedding pictures I need to send to people. All these little things that aren't hard to do, but I can't seem to get them done. (sigh)
Anyhow, I am excited about the trip. It will be lovely to be in Czech again; to see family and friends, to experience the culture and the history, to eat a few different kinds of food (much more for Mark's benefit than mine) and just to get a different view of life. I just wish my bags would pack myself, my life would magically get itself in order, and my motivation would return with the boundless energy of a three year old. I know, asking a lot, but a girl's gotta try.

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