What a month. After starting to get my feet back under myself in March, April pretty much knocked the wind back out of me. There were highs (a nice visit with my parents), lows (taxes and recent bad news for a friend), and everything in between. The days have spun, whirled, blurred themselves together in a mix of heavenly sunny weather, and the typical cold damp gray of an Oregon spring. I find myself now, at the end of this month, wondering again how childhood time ever seemed to move at a snails pace, because I swear it was just a few days ago that I was taking down the store Christmas tree, and here we are all stocked for Mother's Day and Summer.
This afternoon I am heading off to a retreat with the ladies from the church I currently attend. This will be my first night away from home since Christmas, and my first night away from our silly little dog ever. I find myself a bit of a worried mess about him, even as I'm super excited for this opportunity to get out and do something different. I am under no illusions that having a pet is the same as having a child, but I can't deny the mothering instinct that this separation has given birth to within me. Will he remember to eat and drink while I am away? Will he whine at night when he realizes that I am not coming home. Will he curl up in my spot on the bed beside my husband, or pitifully wait on the couch for my return? I'm sure he'll be just fine, and that I'll be rewarded with lots of dog claw scratches and warm tongued licks when I do get back, but I can't help but feel a little guilty for leaving him behind...
Well, I had no idea all of that would come out. I think one of the most fascinating things about writing is when I just let go and allow whatever is really inside me to reveal itself. All this to say, I'm really looking forward to my little night away, and hoping that I will come back refreshed and ready to better be the person I'm meant to be. Okay, that last line was sorta lame, but you know what I mean ;)
